Disembodied Female Abdomens
This is way too many abdomens
Seems like lately I see at least five DFAs a day.
Locally there are two billboards for The Rush that have huge DFAs — one on HWY 52 says “Join the Firm.” (Interestingly, a billboard on 40 Business, I think, has a post-workout man of average physique with an inset of his heart, reading “it’s what’s inside that counts.” You can’t make up this kind of contradiction.)
DFAs account for four out of nine representations of women in the 22 ads in my Facebook ad board (obviously skewed what Facebook thinks are my interests, with all the diets and babies and Obamas). The other five are marathon-cheater Rosie Ruiz, candidate for county commissioner Ellen Reckhow, a smiling woman of color in a relationship ad (at least it’s not a man dating some abs; a cartoon silhouette and disembodied female muffin-tops — allegedly the consequences of failing to get satisfactory DFAs, but more generally what happens when you put any woman in ill-fitting pants.
Anyhoo.
Reminds me of Ford Prefect’s assuming cars are Earth’s dominant species. If I were visiting from another planet, I would start worshipping Shania Twain.
Some time soon, a young woman will be standing in front of her love, saying, “Do my forearms look weird when I do this?”– and it will be your fault.
Nothing frames a lovely abdomen like gleefully ‘Shopped forearms. You ever really looked at a forearm when it’s positioned thusly? It looks weeeeeeird.
Noting too that all four of the examples there are disembodied female abdomens with arms akimbo. Not unreasonable, of course– that pose goes naturally with the oft-heard, “And this is my navel. You got a problem with that, fellah?”