It’s back! Will you be a leader? A mercenary? A thief? Answer 20 simple questions to find out what your role will be when the dead walk and the living run:

Quiz: Who Will You Be in the Zombie Apocalypse?

This quiz first appeared in 2007, but has been exported, re-imported, re-formatted, re-written and re-a-bunch-of-stuff for your amusement.

My result this time, as ever: the Guru/Hairdresser/Masseuse. Apparently my long-term plan is to lay low and be entertaining enough to live ’til the closing credits. Now I gotta go learn how to do braids.

Some other things to get done before zombie apocalypse, aka zombocalypse:

• Take up bowhunting
• Get LASIK
• Floss more
• Stockpile nailclippers
• Learn how to make booze, which will be currency in the Time After. Is apparently a process and requires some gear. Acquire gear. Prior to that, acquire space to store gear. Aw, forget it, just stockpile booze
• Keep a plant alive more than three months
• Remember how they made that solar still on 3-2-1 Contact
• Check my earthquake kit, ’cause I’m pretty sure that trail mix is stale
• Befriend Ving Rhames